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Pseuds Corner

  And what was this delirious, delicious night if not fantasies bleeding into reality? It happened gradually, then suddenly; first seeming as though it would never start, then as though it would never finish. A silver haze poured from a sky that betrayed neither day nor night, the lines between heaven and earth blurred as though even the gods deemed this a spectacle they couldn't miss. The anarchic mass of sound and colour was so overwhelming and primal that this resembled more revolution than sporting event. The stadium shook as though dancing along to the rapture, as though the earth might give way at any moment. (Private Eye, 2026: Rory Smith on England v Mexico, Observer) Tlaloc, Aztec God of Rain unknown artist Photo Credit: Hastings Museum and Art Gallery [CC BY-NC] The official Adidas Belgium away jersey for the World Cup is a unique, light blue shirt featuring pink, white and black accents, designed as a tribute to the Belgian surrealist artist Rene Magritte... The base col...

Wasted Talent

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  Many kids at my comprehensive [school]were as talented as my peers at Balliol [Oxford University] but never got close to university. What I saw at Oxford was not the soft bigotry of low expectations but of entitlement: kids who lacked ability but had plenty of credentials (a very different thing) and contacts. "One or two telephone calls are still necessary to find places for the borderlines," John Rae, the head master of Westminster School in the 1980s, admitted when talking about how he got so many pupils into Oxbridge. "Some lavish dinners for dons may have gone into preparing for those calls." In his book Chums , Simon Kuper notes that Alec Douglas-Home was admitted to Oxford "practically as his birthright, got a third class degree and still went on to become prime minister, the third consecutive Etonian in the job". Merit Francesco Guardi (1712-1793) Photo Credit: Walker Art Gallery {CC BY-NC]   A version of this rigged system persists today: 7 per ...

Mo Salah - Chasing the Dream

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 Hamid Nouh, Salah's first coach: "He was ready to sacrifice everything, he wanted to work hard, and liked to learn." It sounds simple, until you start drilling at the heart of what it means for a boy from Nagrig to endure a  nine-hour round trip five days a week to train in Cairo. Cairo: Shoe Bazaar Robert Charles Goff (1837-1922) Photo Credit: Victoria Art Gallery [CC BY-NC-ND] Salah's route [at age  14 ] has become so well known, you can read the tale of the minimum four buses he needed to take each way in Chinese, Spanish and every other major language. One from the T-junction at the edge of his village to reach Basyoun. The transfer from there to the capital of the Gharbia Governorate, Tanta. The great slog of around 100km to reach the rush of Ramses Square. A connection from Cairo's chaotic central transport hub to Nasr City. And, on the luckier days, a ride close to the club's gates to spare Salah having to run almost two kilometres up a steep hill to ...

Illegitimi non carborundum

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  Ok. I've waited long enough. Where is it? I have just turned 52. Where, oh where, is my promised no-f**ks-to-give era that people have now been promising me for over a decade? When do I get this surge of self-confidence that allows me to shuck off social convention and expectation. [Has it ever occurred to you that you might be one of those people who just lack self-confidence. Perhaps you are also one of those people who just likes to accept social convention and expectation.] Merry Go Round Mark Gertler (1891-1939) Photo Credit: Tate [CC BY NC ND]  When I was in the throes of adolescence I was, like most of us, so acutely self-conscious I could barely walk down the street without suffering violent mental agonies. [So most of us were so acutely self-conscious and suffered violent mental agonies? Really?] Dealing with school discos, first nightclubs, parties was commensurately worse. [Uncomfortable, I can understand. So h ow violent were your mental agonies?]   But I to...

Superstars and Self-Love

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 Take Cristiano Ronaldo, Serena Williams and Taylor Swift, a triumphant trio for the ages. Each is blessed with the two things you need to reach the top: huge talent coupled with a ferocious work ethic. There's an awful lot to love - if only they didn't seem to love themselves so much. Swift's talent and generosity are as awesome as the wealth they've generated for her. Why, in a Disney + docuseries about her huge Eras tour, we saw her distributing envelopes to emotional crew members, sharing out some of the profits. Wonderful! Who does that? On the other hand, who has themselves filmed doing that. And now she's married, which is wonderful too. Millions shared her joy. But was it necessary to book for the purpose one of the world's  most celebrated venues, bringing New York City to a standstill? At the moment the deed was done, in the manner of smoke puffing out of the Vatican chimney, the billboards at Madison Square Garden flashed up the glad tidings for the w...

Royal Reform

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  A journey of a thousand miles begins with a simple step. So goes the ancient Chinese proverb, and so it is with the announcement from Buckingham Palace that we are to learn this week how much tax the King paid in 2024-25. In one sense this is nothing new, as the Palace acknowledges. As Prince of Wales, Charles regularly declared how much tax he paid. It was however, a practice foolishly abandoned  by William when he became Prince of Wales. Now he has been forced into an embarrassing about-turn. When Poverty Enters the Door unknown artist Photo Credit: Worthing Museum and Art Gallery [CC BY-ND] The public, outraged by the burgeoning cost of the monarchy, have been appalled to learn of Charles and William charging a fortune for soldiers to yomp across Dartmoor, and for charging the NHS millions to park ambulances in an empty warehouse in London.  They have been disgusted by the peppercorn rents charged to Andrew and Edward for their mansions in Windsor Great Park and Surr...

Data Meets Common Sense

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  Has the optimisation rebellion begun? Something seemed to shift in the collective psyche recently when the world discovered the entrepreneur and podcaster Steven Bartlett's reaction to having had "a couple of glasses of wine" on a school night... Bartlett explained what happened when he decided to test the effects of drinking after a year of sobriety - a sombre catalogue of catastrophes recorded by his Whoop tracker. He slept less, ate poorly, skipped the gym and - prepare yourself - "podcasted worse". "It ruined three days of my life," he said, seemingly in earnest Boors Carousing Dutch School Photo Credit: York Museum Trust [Public Domain]  Last month the internet finally erupted in long overdue mockery. Bartlett made such a meal of it, which I think offended British sensibilities...   But behind the "Chill out, bruh" teasing was something deeper; thoughtful or sincerely pissed-off critiques of optimisation culture... BBC Radio 1 host Gre...